T-Mobile hates Macs

When I dumped my Treo for a new phone, I had three options: Buy another Palm, which hadn’t seen real development in years, buy a Windows Mobile device (support Microsoft? NO WAY!), or try out the “businessman’s addiction” also known as the Blackberry or Crackberry. I had always been turned off by Blackberry’s lack of attention to the consumer, but luckily, RIM had just introduced the 8100 Pearl and it was sexy enough to make me jump brands.

Since then, I’ve completely fallen in love with RIM and Blackberry as a whole. The security is terrific, PUSH email services are almost too good (see crackberry), and it has a lot of really cool business features like automatic on and off periods as dictated by your work schedule that make it an amazing phone. All those features married to a sexy little form factor with a functional camera were enough to make me overlook one huge blemish: RIM really doesn’t understand the Mac community. I know, I know, we are a fickle bunch and it’s a lot to ask for iSync with iCal and Address Book integration when Outlook “just works” (/sarcasm). Because Outlook doesn’t exist on the Mac (Entourage DOES NOT COUNT), RIM made a devastating decision to officially support PocketMac’s sync utitlity instead of developing their own. Why devastating you ask? Because PocketMac is quite possibly the single most confounding piece of software I’ve ever made the mistake of installing. Or I guess I should say tried to install. Stroll over to their support forums some time and check out the topics. There is about a 5% success rate to even get the thing to recognize the USB cable, much less install software or communicate intelligently with your handheld. But I digress.

The point is, the email service and rock solid reliability of the Blackberry is so good, I was actually willing to forgo being able to connect it to my mac. Also, MissingSync from MarkSpace was coming out, and that would make things better. It came out, and just like its sync services for Palm, it worked on the first try. Even though I had to pay for it (hey RIM, how about “officially supporting” something that works?), I now had a functional device. Until yesterday.

Out of the blue, my phone stops being able to answer phone calls. The call comes in, the screen lights up. I can scroll up and down to highlight “answer” or “ignore,” but I cannot do anything to the call by pushing in the trackball or by manually hitting the green and red buttons. Instead, I have to sit and wait for the call to be missed, and then call them back. This is especially annoying when the number is “unknown” or “unlisted” and I’m left with nothing.

I don’t blame RIM for this problem. I’m an experienced phone user and am well versed in the fact that some phones go bad. I am also very good at getting free replacements out of the carrier. I probably went through 4 Treos, and this is my 2nd Pearl (different issue). The thing is, it’s a real pain in the butt to deal with the beaurocracy, so I tend to wait a couple days until I have a couple hours to kill. I call T-Mobile, key through to PDA support, and go through the usual process. “No, the phone has never been dropped.” “No, its never been wet.” Blah biddity blah blah. Then the woman on the other line asks me something new. “What version of the RIM OS are you using?” I cue up the options menu, and read her the last four digits of the OS. Turns out, RIM updated their software the 24 hours before, and in order to get my replacement phone, I have to install it. “Just in case.”

Me: “But this problem was happening before the update.”

Her: “I know sir, but it’s company policy. Please connect your Pearl to your PC and download the update.”

Me: “Ok, we have a problem: I use a mac.”

Her: “So?”

Me: “Well, to the best of my knowledge, RIM doesn’t have a software installer for Macs.”

Her: “Thats ok, just hook it up to a friend’s PC.”

Me: “All my friends are creative types, they use macs too. Even at work, they are Mac’s.”

Her: “Well, just go find a PC. Then call us back.”

Here’s where everything went sour. I use a Mac because I honestly don’t feel comfortable on a PC. I didn’t feel comfortable back when I had my own PC, and I sure as hell don’t feel comfortable connecting my “secure” phone with all my personal data to some stranger’s virus/spyware laden computer so that I can install an update that I know has nothing to do with my phone just so T-Mobile will honor their warranty.

Me: “Yea, I’m not going to do that. This is a business critical phone. I’m not going to connect it to a random computer just so that I can jump through T-Mobile’s hoops.”

Her: “Then there is nothing we can do for you.”

Me: “So, let’s get everything crystal clear: You will not honor my warranty on the phone you sold to me without stipulation, the phone that cannot answer calls, because of my choice in computers?

Her: “Yes.”

Me: “ok.. it’s time to get your manager on the phone.”

See, that’s your trump card when dealing with big corporations. The 1st tier voice is just there to ask you the questions that appear on their screen. They also serve as a screening process to frustrate the customers that don’t know any better. By demanding to speak to their managers (and their managers, and so on until you get what you want), you are being bumped to someone who is being paid more and who knows more about their job. Eventually, you will arrive at someone who is paid too much to deal with someone like you, and they will just send you a replacement phone to get you off the line. Trust me, it works. Just not today.

Her manager comes on the phone and I explain my situation again in a calm voice. “See, I can’t install the software. I’m more than happy to send you guys the phone and let you do it.”

Him: “Yea, we can’t do that.”

Me: “Well, I can’t install it over the air. I don’t have a PC. I’m not going to connect it to a computer I don’t know. You are confirming that you WILL NOT replace my phone or honor my warranty because I use a Mac?”

Him: “Yes.”

Me: You do realize that you’ve really left me no choice and made my decision clear for me, right? I’ll be selling this phone and leaving T-Mobile for a carrier that doesn’t descriminate against me because of my taste in computers.

Him: “[mumbles something along the lines of] oh well, blah blah schmaaaa we’ll miss you.”

Thats when I hung up. The previous phone that I alluded to earlier was replaced when it wouldn’t ring after I punched in a number. T-Mobile tech support (no new os release this time) started the replacement process until they asked what color the moisture indicator strip was. Turns out it was red, but had never been wet. The woman told me that it could have been tripped by something as slight as body heat coming through my pants pocket, or being set down on a counter top that had recently been wiped down. I countered by asking if thats true, how could she prove that it hadn’t been tripped in shipment or even at the factory. She offered me a Blackberry 8800 for $500 bucks and two-year agreement. I told her that for 500 bucks and a 2-year agreement, that I was going to get an iPhone and move to a carrier that wasn’t trying to scam me. *BING* Magic words. “Sir, do you mean that?” Uh yea, I mean that. “Well, let’s get you over to customer loyalty.” What followed was the biggest ass kissing session ever heard. Out of sheer fear caused by the iPhone, T-Mobile overnighted my new Pearl, and waved any fees from the moisture indicator.

So, utterly disgusted, there is no way that I can stay with T-Mobile in good conscience. A company that caves under the threat of a new phone with new features, but is unwilling to accomodate a long time customer who chooses his own operating environment is not a company I want to be with.

For those curious, I will not be jumping ship to the death star. I will be holding out for the Google Phone release, and then I’m history. Sorry T-Mobile, you had your chance and you blew it. Next time, try to Think Different.